poor liars

Holy choir tigers and tinker bells!!!


i just figured why i can be both the worst liar in the world and at the same time convince others with moonlight and manure (much like many NOLA tour guides) as if it were gospel...

the poles of variance are: desperation for meaning vs. the fear of a paradigm shift.

i.e. ....

1) shit ain't workin' out for me in any reasonable way.... so, if you have an answer that seems slightly less unreasonable than what I've been raised to believe.. I'll be inclined to explore any seemingly less miserable option...

vs.

2) if i cling to the rosy remnants of my parents creed or that of the lousey- (lousy or louse-y? same dif.. lol)  majority that is clearly not serving the needs of.. well most anything....

personally i feel much more a champion of my own existence when i can survive with and despite the challenges of being alone, self-reliant, and as in tune with the world around me as i can be...

.. but humans are social creatures... this is true, i cannot refute the bliss of true companionship with another human...

...however, true companionship is not limited to a singe species to species contact. Ever hear of "Mans' best friend?"

... I'm sure there are those out there (in reality or on TV) that can claim companionship with a broader sense of a communion with nature, something beyond themselves, larger, more spiritual, than a one-on-one experience...

...have you ever just stood somewhere and watched the world happen?...

"alone in a field at twilight, at dusk?"

Alone among mesas
and
witnessed that passage of eons
as ancient waters submerge the landscape and giant icthians escape the receding tides,
receding tides and slow currents
scraping out monuments to that which came before leaving only you, alone a speck among a vast
cosmic ocean of meaningless sand,
and it is there when stripped of all conscience and meaning and desire and hope

that one can finally begin to grasp ones own finality...


and that. right there, actually, is a reason, a purpose, something other than the motions to live for....



and that's what it's all about.